Category Archives: Memories

My Best Friend Who Taught Me How to Live Life

“Joan Knutson,” just saying her name brings a smile to my face. When we were babies, our families lived next door to each other in Fullerton. So I guess we started playing together as toddlers.

We moved to Anaheim when I was 2 and her family moved to the far end of town. I remember Mrs.Knutson bringing Joan over to play. Joan lived an adventurous life! She had a wild imagination! It was during the war so we were searching for Nazis a lot of the time. Now you have to understand, I played alone most of the time and only read about adventures. I was a very cautious child. 

There was an old barn next door and naturally I never went near it but Joan just knew we had to

explore it. We peaked through the cobwebs hanging from the open window and I remember the fear in the pit of my stomach but Joan spotted something in the corner, partially covered with an old dirty tarp. Joan was inside before I could say “no, we aren’t allowed!” I was scared but followed her inside. She pulled back the tarp to reveal a rusty old bike with flat tires. She thought it was great and knew I had never had a bike.

We ran home and she talked to my dad, saying how he could fix it up for me. And she would teach me how to ride. Nothing was impossible for Joan. Well, that’s exactly what happened. The neighbor was happy to get rid of the old bike and my dad painted it, sprayed silver paint on the handlebars, added a basket and bell. It was beautiful to me! And Joan and her brother taught a scared 10 year old how to ride. I’ll never forget that exhilarating feeling of the wind in my face as I suddenly realized no one was holding the bike anymore!

There were many adventures with Joan but I want to share one more story. We grew apart as teens but always sent Xmas cards and wrote little notes, keeping in touch even after we got married.

One summer Blaine and I and our four kids rented a place in San Diego for a week. I phoned Joan and

asked if we could meet up. I hadn’t seen her since we were kids. Joan and Chuck and their 8 kids arrived for our little beach party. The kids became friends and we talked and laughed for hours.

Later, Joan and I with a few kids tagging along, went for a walk on the beach walk. We came to a
house with a lovely Christmas tree all decorated and with twinkling lights in the front window. Mind you, this was July. I saw that look in Joan’s face and sure enough, she wanted to knock on the door and find out why there was a tree. Never in a thousand years would I be that bold and bother people I didn’t know. But up the steps Joan went with all the kids trailing behind her. I stood back waiting for the rejection I expected. But the door opens and a sweet old lady invited all of us in and gave us cookies. She said she was never lonely at Christmas so her son suggested she have Christmas all year long.
 
It pleased her so much we came. I realized how much in life you miss by being overly cautious. How I miss Joan but will always have these wonderful memories to remind me to seize the day and all it brings.

Love of Books, in the Family Genes

My first memory of books was in Anaheim, CA. I was around 3 and Mom gave me this large Teddy Bear book that was old, very old. It had belonged to my Aunt Virginia,  Dot and Bud. The red hard cover was faded and frayed. I liked looking at the pictures as my mom read the rhymes to me. But there was one page all about a bad bear who had a knife and was threatening another little bear. It frightened me and I hated it.  One day  when I was alone, I took my pencil and scribbled all over the bad bear so he couldn’t hurt anyone. I knew I shouldn’t make marks on book pages, but this was different. I had to stop the evil. I believe this was the first time I’d ever seen anything bad and it made an impression on me. Continue reading

World War II

 Japanese Bomb Pearl Harbor Dec. 7, 1941
It was a Sunday morning and we had our radio on in the background like we always did, (no TV in those days!) and suddenly there was an interruption in the program and the announcement came that the Japanese had sunk many of our ships and destroyed much of Pearl Harbor. We were absolutely shocked to hear that thousands of our service men were killed. I remember feeling very frightened because I saw the fear on my parent’s faces. They had talked about Hitler in Europe and hoped we wouldn’t have to go to war. But now it was different.

Uncle Sam Wants You!

My brother and his wife came over and also my sister and her husband. Our family sat huddled around the radio for the entire day talking about what might happen next. Could the Japanese get as far as Calif.? I remember my brother who was 22, saying he was joining the Army and I was afraid for him. It’s a day I will never forget.

Bud fought in France and Germany and then was on his way to Japan when the Atomic Bomb was dropped and Japan surrendered. He was lucky to have lived through it all without being wounded. I wrote to him and remember feeling very worried about his safety.  It was very cold in France so I started knitting a khaki colored scarf for him. I just kept knitting until it was very, very long! When he received it he said he loved it because he could wrap it around his neck a lot of times to keep warm. He sent me a little charm from a city called Toule in France for my charm bracelet. All the girls wore charm bracelets and kept adding more charms to them.

Save Rubber

Patriotism
We knew there was a war going on in Europe with Hitler trying to take over all the countries, but it was such a shock to learn that Japan wanted to do the same thing. A few days after Pearl Harbor, President Franklin D. Roosevelt, declared war on Japan and also Germany. Everyone’s life in the U.S. changed after that. All the young men were anxious to defend their country and everyone pulled together to help in any way they could. It was a very patriotic time when people were proud of their country and knew we could defeat the enemy. No one opposed the war because we knew if we didn’t fight, our country could be next.

The war years were very patriotic years. Everyone wanted to do their part to help the war effort. I remember saving tin foil from gum wrappers and forming it into a ball and then turning it in at a collection box at school. They took the aluminum foil and melted it down to make aluminum for airplanes. We also saved anything rubber to help make rubber tires for the vehicles.   To help our country financially, everyone bought savings bonds. The money was used to help our country fight the war.

Rationing
I also remember food and gas rationing. Everyone used less so our soldiers would have plenty of food and gas for their trucks. Each family received a coupon book for the month. We couldn’t buy butter so we bought oleomargarine. It was sealed in a plastic pouch and was white. There was a little capsule of food coloring inside and you popped it and then massaged the oleo until it turned yellow. I loved doing it.

Sugar was rationed too so we didn’t have many desserts or cookies. Gasoline was rationed and people had a hard time getting back and forth from work. Everyone had Victory Gardens in their back yards. We grew vegetables and had chickens for the eggs. Everyone used less so our soldiers could have plenty of food and gas for their trucks. I never remember anyone complaining about doing without. We were so proud we could do our part for the war effort.

Our Family
Since we lived near the Pacific Coast, we heard that our government had placed large anti-aircraft guns up and down the beaches along our coastline. My older sister who was 24, volunteered to help out by driving trucks to the different gun locations where the soldiers were, and giving them supplies and coffee and cookies.

I remember my mom and sister putting tan colored liquid on their legs instead of nylon stockings. (Nylon was used in the war effort. ) Their legs looked all streaky from the liquid and my sis said she was going to sit in the sun and get a tan on her legs. Tanning your skin became very popular.

I remember Mom hanging a little flag with one blue star in our window. It meant we had one person in our family fighting in the war. Nearly everyone had a flag with 1, 2 or sometimes 3 stars. If you saw a flag with a gold star, you knew their loved one had died.

Air Raids
My dad was an air-raid warden. At night when we heard the air-raid sirens I was always very scared. We never knew if it was for real or just a test. We would pull down all our shades so no light showed and huddle around the radio.  Dad put on his uniform and went around from house to house on our block, making sure everyone had their lights off or at least their shades pulled so no light could be seen. That way if Japanese planes came over they wouldn’t be able to see where our cities were. Thank goodness the Japanese never got over to the U.S.

In Southern Calif. there were a lot of defense plants, (factories that made airplanes). The buildings were covered with camouflage netting on the sides and roofs. The roofs looked like tiny farms and farmland from the air, this was done to fool the Japanese so they wouldn’t bomb the factories if they flew over. My dad worked at one of the defense plants making airplanes.

Buy War Bonds

Savings Bonds
To help our country financially, everyone bought savings bonds. The money was used to help our country fight the war. I was in grade school during the war and remember bringing 4 quarters every week to the teacher, and she would give me 4 “savings stamps” that I pasted into a little book. When the book was filled up with $18.75 worth of stamps, we got a “$25.00 Savings Bond”. After the war we cashed in the bonds and received $25.00. So, how much interest did we make on our investment? And how many weeks did it take to fill the book? (This is the “teacher” in me talking now!!)

Plant a Victory Garden

Victory Gardens
Another way we helped fight the war, was by having a “Victory Garden”. We grew a lot of our own vegetables so there would be more food for the soldiers. We lived in Temple City and had a large back yard. I remember watching our carrots, onions and lettuce pop up. It seemed to taste better from our garden. Nearly everyone grew food in their gardens.  It was the patriotic thing to do.

We also had chickens.  It was my job to feed the chickens and gather the eggs. I loved animals and one of the chickens was my pet. She was white and I named her June. She would sit on my lap next to my kitty, Spicy and my toy fox terrier, Spotty. They all got along fine. 

Japanese Concentration Camps
During the first part of World War II when we went to war with Japan, the U.S. government was afraid the Japanese people who lived along the Pacific Coast might be a threat to our country, so they went around and sent all these families to concentration camps. There was a camp at the Santa Anita Race Track up near Pasadena. They closed the horse races and fenced the area and put up temporary houses in the parking lot. I remember looking out the window of our car and seeing children and adults peering out of the fence. I didn’t think too much about it since I was young, but later I felt it was a very unfair thing to do. Nearly all of these Japanese people were born here in the U.S. and were American citizens.  They didn’t want Japan to take over the U.S. They lost their homes and property and had a very difficult time after the war was over.  There were camps all over the west coast and Bob, my brother-in-law who was an electrician, helped wire many of the camps.

Propaganda Posters
The government published posters instilling hatred for the enemy. By stirring up these feelings, they knew people would respond and help on the national front. I remember in school buying savings stamps and saving aluminum foil so I could do my part to knock out Hitler in Germany, Mussolini in Italy and Hirohito in Japan. We hated them and loved the U.S. It gave us hope that we would defeat the enemy and remain free.

Navajo Code Talkers
After the war we heard the story about the Navajo Code Talkers. When the war was on, the Japanese were excellent decoders and no matter what type of code the U.S. used, the Japanese military could decode it and know what we were planning to do. There were some Navajo Indians in the military and they said the Navajo language was very difficult to decode and only a few people knew their language. There were 29 Navajo Indians at Camp Pendleton here in Calif. who became the ones who sent coded messages the Japanese couldn’t figure out. They helped win the war!

As far as animals helping in the war, many were used. Over 200,000 pigeons sent messages and dolphins were trained by the Navy to use their natural sonar to find underwater mines. I’m sure horses and dogs were used too.

Women in the Workplace
It was interesting after the war, because women had been the ones working in the defense plants and taking over the jobs of all the men who were away fighting. Many women continued to work. Before then, very few women worked but stayed home as wives and mothers. Women were beginning to become more independent and realize they were strong. No longer were women looked at as the “weaker sex.” In my family, my mom was a smart, strong woman who ran the finances in our family, had her own Beauty Shop with employees and still had time and energy for me.

The War Ends
I remember the day the war was over with Germany in May 1945. Everyone celebrated and ran out to the street happy and excited. A few months later we did it again when the war with Japan was over in Sept. 1945. I knew my brother would soon be home. Life would now return to normal.

 

 

Discovering a New Path

July 5, 2016….it was a long time coming but back in September of 2015, I decided I could no longer travel the dark and rocky path with deep crevices and danger at every turn. I knew there had to be another road but the direction wasn’t clear. I made the decision to step off this path that led no where and make my own way. It wasn’t easy, yet I knew there must be a road to take me to safety.  Sunlight appeared and at last I found my new home and felt the peace of security.

I’ve been smiling for the past six months, just a comfortable, happy smile that feels warm and safe. My little home is just the right size for Cindy and me. We have everything we need and feel love here.

The support and love from my family and friends made my transition smooth. I don’t know what I’d do without them. And now I’m meeting new friends and enjoying creative time in my large art studio. Teaching watercolor to Dana, Sarah and Chase is fun. I also teach my Book Club friends how to paint. Then there’s my art Journaling group where we have lunch and paint or write in our art journals. Several times a month I meet with a group of women here in Laguna Woods called The Memory Makers to sort photos or scrapbook and share ideas of creative ways to share the precious memories of our family.

My life is on the right track and I’m doing what is right for me. In fact, I’m “free to be me,” my new words I live by. I feel alive and no longer bound by the negativity of the past.

Footnote:
2/9/19…..It’s been 3 years and Cindy and I couldn’t be happier. I feel I’m called to encourage my family and friends and create and write. I hope these memoir entries will inspire and be meaningful to all who read them. My legacy to you.

Falling in Love with Bill Rubarth

Ah, the wonderful expectations of love and finding my true love at 19.

I had been dating Jack Rocchio, a boy my age who attended Cal Tech. He was tall (one of my prerequisites) and smart (another), and fun to be with, but I knew he wasn’t the one! I was very intuitive even then. Jack had asked me to go “steady” (meaning no dating anyone else) and I said no. I didn’t want to miss my opportunity of meeting Mr. Right if he came along.

That was a good decision. A few days later, my modeling teacher asked me if I wanted to be in the Alhambra, “Hi Neighbor” parade, riding on a float with a few other models. She also mentioned her best friend’s brother was returning from Korea and wanted a date with one of her models. I agreed after she told me he was 6’4″ and a very nice guy. 

As the parade was ending and turning the corner to the park, I spotted Gloria (my teacher) standing with this tall handsome young man and my heart skipped a beat! I remember thinking to myself, “I have a feeling he might be the one.”

I didn’t know that Gloria had picked another model on the float and told Bill he could pick either of us. Obviously he picked me.  There was a dance at the park but he asked me if I’d like to go grunion hunting at the beach instead. (He felt funny about being there since the other girl was rejected.) We drove to some beach and yes, the grunion were actually there! We had a lot of fun with him chasing me with a slimy fish!

He was still in the Air Force and had to leave for New Mexico in a couple of days. He asked me out the next night to see a funny Jerry Lewis movie. We drove around looking for the theater where it was playing, and lo and behold it was at a drive-in! We did see the movie (sort of)!

The next day he came to visit me at  Dot’s house since I was baby-sitting her kids for the summer. We talked and finally said good-bye but he told me he’d write. I remember  watching his car backing out of the driveway and hoping we would meet again.

In late September, 1952, we started exchanging letters and began to get to know each other. I could tell he was a sensitive and caring man, very intelligent, with lots of plans for the future. Letter writing reveals a lot about a person.

Fern Dell Park

In November Bill said he was coming to Calif. on leave for 3 days. I was in my 2nd year at Pasadena City College but had Veterans Day off. He arrived early at my house in Temple City. (I lived with my mom and I could tell she liked Bill a lot.) I made a picnic lunch and off we went to Fern Dell Park in Los Angeles near Griffith Park. The day was magical. The quiet and beauty of the park helped us share even more about ourselves. We talked about the many things we had in common, our families and our hopes and dreams. He told me about his dad and the ranch in Texas and being an L.A. policeman. He had 2 older sisters he was very close with.  We talked all day and it was comfortable and lovely. This was the day I fell in love with Bill Rubarth. 

The next evening, Bill took me to meet his family. I was kind of scared  but soon realized his family was just like mine, easy going and nice. I met his dad, his Aunt Besse, Pat & Peg (his sisters) and his grandmother, Mary Felder who raised him from age 12. (His mother died during an operation and this was very difficult for Bill.) The next day he flew back to the Air Force base in New Mexico.  We continued writing our letters but now they were daily. (I still have all of his letters and mine.) His tour of duty was ending in January 1953 and he said he would call me Christmas Eve.

It was Dec. 24, 1952 and the phone rang at 6:00 pm. I just knew it was Bill. I answered and I thought he was calling from NM but he said he was down at the corner and had managed to get discharged early.  Mom fixed dinner and after dinner Dot & Bob with Bobby, Jerry and Sandy arrived along with Bud & Jean, Judy and Linda. So Bill was introduced to my family. We spent a wonderful Christmas Eve together and after everyone left, Bill asked me to go for a little drive with him. It was then that he proposed. I said yes and he told me he wanted to get married in February but I said I couldn’t go to school and plan a wedding that quickly, so we waited until the beginning of Easter vacation, Friday, March 27, 1953. (Yes, I know, we only had 6 dates before he proposed!)

 

We had a small wedding at the Michilinda Presbyterian Church in Pasadena. My sister, Dot was my Matron of Honor and Janet and Maureen (girl friends) were my bridesmaids. Bill’s brother-in-law, Bill Phifer was Best Man, with Bud and Bob as ushers. Sandy was my flower-girl. We went to Lake Arrowhead for our honeymoon. And we lived “happily ever after” (almost!)

Bill (Blaine) and I were married 32 years. We always said we’d love each other “for ever and a day,” and just because paths change and we grow into different people doesn’t mean our love ever ended.

 

My First Day of School

Mother held my hand as we entered the front doors. Everything smelled fresh and clean. The Kindergarten room was off to the right, separated from the other classrooms by a wide hall. As we entered, Miss Clark, my teacher stood in the center of the room. Lots of other boys and girls in new clothes were mingling around her and cautiously looking over the room.

At first I wasn’t sure about Miss Clark.  Her tall, thin frame and straight black hair severely pulled back into a bun, made her plain face seem unfriendly.  But then she spoke, “Welcome Donnalyn.  I know you will love kindergarten.” she said as she pinned a name tag onto my dress. Her soft, kind voice assuaged my fears.

I kissed my mother good bye and felt just a twinge of fear. I quickly glanced out the windows to see if I could still see her.  As I approached the rounded window area I saw the most comforting sight.  There at the base of the windows was a child’s height, long, padded window seat, curving to fit the glass. Sunlight created patterns on the cushions and warmed the area.  Next to it were books, lots of books and I so wanted to just sit there on the window seat and read.  Kindergarten was a safe and wonderful place!

A bell rang signaling the teacher to begin class.  She showed us to long tables with chairs just our size.  I sat near the end because I didn’t know any of the other children.  I looked at their somber faces wondering if any of them would be my friend.  Miss Clark took roll and called all of our names.  I listened carefully for my name because I wanted to do everything exactly right.  She gave each of us a paper with some shapes on it and a red crayon.  She told us to circle the objects that were alike.  I looked it over and immediately knew which were alike and carefully circled each one.  I printed my name with pride on my paper and gave it to her.  She smiled and said, “Good work, Donnalyn.”  The warm, pleased feeling I received when she acknowledged my work was just the beginning of a lifelong desire to always want to do my best.

After a busy morning, Miss Clark said, “All right boys and girls we are going to have some milk and cookies and then it will be recess time.”   After finishing our snack, children started going out the side doors into a play area but I was  sure that “recess” meant that kindergarten was over so I headed out the main door to find my mother. Mom wasn’t there and I was scared, really scared.  Just at that moment, Miss Clark gently took me by the hand and explained it was play time.  My face got red and I began to cry. I wanted so badly to do everything right and now I had failed. Miss Clark assured me it was fine.

I wasn’t too anxious to go outside.  Being brought up in mom’s beauty shop, I didn’t know how to talk and play with other children.  Soon a little girl with curls like mine said “Hi, I’m Barbara.”  I smiled back and our friendship began.  She was shy too, so we felt comfortable with each other.

From that day on, I loved school. Even to this day,  I love taking classes and of course pleasing the teacher and doing my best!

 

 

Every Child Should Have a Pepper Tree

My mom and dad found the perfect home for us in Temple City.  We didn’t own it but it satisfied all of our needs. Mom had her beauty shop in the front rooms of the house, Dad had his sign shop in the little single car garage in the back, and I had my secret world under a huge old pepper tree in the back. The pepper fronds hung to the ground and I had to part them to enter my Tarzan world. Dad had hung a swing and trapeze for me and my imagination filled in everything else. Of course I was Jane, Tarzan’s wife and one of my dolls was Boy. Oh, the adventures we had under that old tree. There were monkeys and apes from my imagination and we had some narrow escapes. On Saturdays I’d take my 12 cents and walk to the movie theater a block away and watch more Tarzan movies to fuel my jungle life episodes.

I drove by the property on the corner of Reno and Las Tunas not long ago. It’s now a parking lot for a K-Mart. But never mind, I have my memories and it will always be my favorite spot. Isn’t it wonderful to imagine and dream?

7 Years Bad Luck

I guess I always knew my childhood was different from other children’s lives.  The children I read about in my collection of books, always portrayed a home with a picket fence in front and a mother who baked cookies for her children and a father who went off to work and came home at night.  Sure my mom was at home but our home consisted of a few rooms behind her beauty shop.  And Dad’s business was in the garage painting signs or trimming windows at the local department store.

My world of play was my imagination. I never thought that we were poor, but I knew money wasn’t plentiful either.  There wasn’t an abundance of toys but that didn’t matter.  I could always figure out something creative to do.

One day, when I was 7, I discovered a beautiful round beauty shop mirror stored under my mom and dad’s bed.  I pulled it out and cautiously leaned it against the bed.  I could see all of myself so I began to dance around in front of it, practicing the dance steps I had learned at tap class.

Suddenly the mirror slipped and crashed into many pieces.  I was horrified!  I remembered my mother telling me that if you broke a mirror you would have 7 years of bad luck.  I thought, maybe if no one knows about it, there won’t be bad luck, so I carefully took the pieces out the back door and hid them in some tall grass in the back yard.

Of course Mom found them.  She didn’t get after me but I felt terrible because I knew I had broken something very expensive.  In the midst of all the turmoil I did some quick calculations and figured that I would have bad luck until I was 14 years old.  (I remember turning 14 and thinking the curse is finally off!)

 

Shirley Temple Curls

Shirley Temple was the popular child star of the mid 30’s.  With her golden curls and cute smile, all mothers wanted their little girls to look like her.  Mom was no different.  But she had an advantage.  She owned a beauty shop and she could make that dream a reality.  I already had the golden hair but it was straight as a string!  She had just purchased the latest permanent wave machine.  A tall menacing contraption with long wires which attached to rods that were used to wind up the hair.  After the terrible smelling solution was applied to the rods, the machine was turned on and I was sure I would die!  I would probably be electrocuted like Mom had warned me, since this machine was plugged into that outlet.  I held my breath and hoped I would make it.  After what seemed like an eternity, the machine was turned off and Mom checked my curls.  They were beautiful.  I was sure I was as cute as Shirley Temple, minus the dimples.  (I always wanted dimples.)

All of the ladies who came into the shop would comment on how cute I looked and I loved the attention.  I remember sitting and listening to these women talk.  I probably heard more than a two or three year old should hear but it just felt good being around people and not alone in the back of the house.

Anaheim Beauty shopOne of my mother’s beauticians, Dorothy Renfro, had some slow time and I asked if I could comb her  long, thick hair.  I combed and combed and then I twisted the comb around and around so I could make beautiful curls, but soon the comb was all tangled in her hair. I was scared. Mom worked and worked trying to get it out but I believe some of Dorothy’s hair had to be cut off.  I think that may have been when I decided I certainly didn’t want to be a beauty operator.

My First Bike

      Dana and Chase used to beg to hear this story over and over every time they stayed all night with me when they were very young.

      I never had a bike as a young child.  They were very expensive and I knew better than to ask for one.  We lived in Temple City on the corner of Reno and Las Tunas Drive.  Again, Mom had her beauty shop in the front rooms of our house and we lived in the remaining rooms.  Dad had his sign shop in the garage and I spent many happy hours under the huge pepper tree in the back yard. 

      Next door lived a nice lady who had a small house but with a big old barn in the back.  I was always intrigued Continue reading